Answered Prayers

Lucía is getting baptized! :)

Lucía is a woman that I have had the pleasure of watching grow over the past months in her faith and commitment to the Lord at Camino de Cristo. She started off extremely timid and barely wanted to pray in front of anyone. She's been one of the most faithful members of the prayer meetings on Tuesday nights, which tend to be smaller. She has begun sharing ideas and interest in participating in ministry, and really wants to serve. She approached Faustino about singing worship, and I'm so encouraged by her desire to step up.

As a step of faith and obedience, she wants to be baptized before leading worship with the team (ps- we HAVE a team now, which is a blessing in and of itself!). It is a huge encouragement and it makes Tomasa tear up just thinking about it.

God's timing continues to amaze me. I had been discouraged for a while at the lack of commitment in the church and how people really didn't seem to be stepping up. I felt like nothing was moving forward and that nothing was going to ever move forward. But God called me to be faithful to the ministry and to faithfully pray for Faustino and Tomasa and the whole church. I know I'm not the only one praying for them, and that alone is an encouragement.

So as God is answering these prayers, I am reminded that God doesn't work on a human timeline--and I'm thankful for that. His timing is perfect and there is a reason why He is building up Camino de Cristo now, and not four months ago. I cannot claim to know what that reason is, but I do know that the God that gathers that water of the sea into jars and puts the deep into storehouses knows what He's doing. :)

encouragement

Last Sunday, we had church at 10am. It was probably the best Sunday service I have been to at Camino de Cristo, and it did not all have to do with the fact that I got to go to church in the morning and not late in the afternoon.

Faustino and Tomasa decided to change church to 10am to be able to accommodate more people and schedules. I appreciate the change because I get to go early in the day. I'm not sure why I appreciate that so much, but I really do.

Even aside from that, it was just a great service for my heart. The fruit of Faustino and Tomasa's labor showed as people they had visited and ministered to showed up and nearly filled the church. There were two new families, one of which was very large. In addition to those new families, Faustino's son's in-laws have decided to come alongside the ministry and serve. Mari and José are strong believers and I think they will be a great support to Faustino and Tomasa.

In addition, when José started preaching and didn't excuse the children for kiddie church, Cuquita slowly stood up, caught Faustino's eye and motioned that she was going to take the children for the children's class. There were about 12 kids, so I followed her out and asked if she wanted me to come give her a hand. She pondered it a moment and then told me confidently that she could do it. I was so encouraged as I watched her lead the harem to the classroom behind the sanctuary.

I was blessed to be able to stay and listen to the sermon. José preached on unity in the church and how it is the job of the entire congregation to build into the church, not just the job of the pastor. He said something so poignant that I had never heard before: pastores no reproducen ovejas, ovejas reproducen ovejas (Pastors don't reproduce sheep, sheep reproduce sheep). He said this and it made so much sense that all I could do was smile. It was cool because one of the sheep was calling the rest of the sheep to action. I really appreciated it.

After church, we all went into Faustino and Tomasa's house to visit with Tomasa who was still bed-ridden because of her back. A good group of us went in and sat with her and talked about life and ministry. Mari and Tomasa chatted about ideas and things they want to do and how they want to expand ministries in the church. It made my heart jump with joy because I have been praying for strong leaders to come alongside the ministry and support Faustino and Tomasa so they can serve better and reach further. So now that Mari and José are there, that possibility is so much more in reach. Praise God for the way He works.

Please continue to pray for Tomasa as she continues with problems with her back. Pray that she would heal completely. Pray that she would take it easy. Pray that she would let Mari help her in ministry and that she wouldn't try to bear the load alone. As we all know too well, sometimes it is hard to share the burden that is squashing us, even though it is exactly what we need to do to stay afloat and to keep things moving forward.

A prayer stolen from Marcos' Blog

MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

- Thomas Merton, “Thoughts in Solitude”

As we wait upon the Lord

Last night, we had prayer at Faustino's--it was Tuesday, and it was what we do on Tuesdays. Faustino is in Tijuana helping out the new District Superintendent, Roberto, along with the other Pastors on a construction project. In his absence, Tomasa lead the prayer meeting. I'd never been to a prayer meeting that Tomasa lead before, but I shouldn't have been surprised when she ran it differently, because everyone has their own way of doing things.

She invited me to pray to start the meeting off and as I prayed I asked God to open our ears and hearts to receive what He may have for us in the time of prayer. I felt like God had something to say to us in our time of prayer and I didn't want to miss it.

Before praying, we read Psalm 6:

O LORD, do not rebuke me in your anger
or discipline me in your wrath.

Be merciful to me, LORD, for I am faint;
O LORD, heal me, for my bones are in agony.

My soul is in anguish.
How long, O LORD, how long?

Turn, O LORD, and deliver me;
save me because of your unfailing love.

No one remembers you when he is dead.
Who praises you from the grave?

I am worn out from groaning;
all night long I flood my bed with weeping
and drench my couch with tears.

My eyes grow weak with sorrow;
they fail because of all my foes.

Away from me, all you who do evil,
for the LORD has heard my weeping.

The LORD has heard my cry for mercy;
the LORD accepts my prayer.

All my enemies will be ashamed and dismayed;
they will turn back in sudden disgrace.

Tomasa asked us all to focus in on one verse that spoke to us as we read and share what we understood as we read it. I shared verse 9: The LORD has heard my cry for mercy;/ the Lord accepts my prayer. It really spoke to me because it is a declaration of answered prayer, a prayer that was a pleading to God for rescue. It doesn't pretend to be anything it is not, it just lays out the weakness and waits for God to answer.

After, we all shared our prayer requests and then each were assigned a person to lift up in prayer. I was assigned to pray for Tomasa. Her prayer requests were for her daughter Lily's marriage, her family in general, Faustino, her grandkids, her spiritual life, and healing. Tomasa has a weak heart and is fatigued quickly and often. On top of that, she gets what she calls "aching bones" (dolor de huesos). The only parallel I can find is the pain you feel when you have a fever and your whole body just hurts.

Tomasa has been battling with these ailments since long before I ever met her. It hurts my heart to see her suffer like this because I love her. It also hurts because I know the impact she has for the Kingdom when she's feeling well, and I hate knowing that loss. When Tomasa is in action, she is such a force that she could just run her way through a brick wall!

As I pray for Tomasa, I tell God how frustrated I am that she is still sick. I tell God that I don't understand why He still has not healed her, but also tell him that I know He knows what He's doing. I ask him for patience and faith in His plan for Tomasa and ask for Him to be glorified. I want healing now, but if it needs to come later or not at all to glorify God more, then I want that more.

We are waiting on the Lord for healing. We are waiting on the Lord. As I prayed and proclaimed that we are waiting on Him, the song Everlasting God came to my heart. I started singing and really meditating about what it is to wait on the Lord and how strength rises as we wait on him. In all honesty, I didn't come to any great conclusions other than remembering what Tara Powers shared about waiting meaning expecting something to happen. You don't just wait for nothing, you wait because you know something is going to happen. So as we wait, we know God is going to do something great and we wait because what God is going to do is far greater than what we would have done. I think in the end that brings strength because there is strength in God's actions and we are strengthened in faith as we see Him act.

Last night I committed to waiting on the Lord for Tomasa. I told God that I want His will to be done and that I expect him to act to glorify Himself, even if that means not healing her now or ever. I truly want that.

Tonight, Lily, Tomasa's daughter, showed up at the Second Floor and informed us that Tomasa is in the hospital again. It hurt my heart, but I remembered what I had said to God and what He had said to me--wait on the Lord. So while I don't know what's going on here, with Tomasa, or with my Aunt Sissy, or with Uncle Jerry, Aunt Irene, or Christy, I wait on the Lord to act, because He will be glorified in the end, and I pray to that end. I invite you to pray that with me for all of these cases. I don't understand why they are sick or what is being accomplished by it all, but I trust God does, and He's gonna work it out.

Your head is aching, I'll make it better

I sat in church yesterday and thought about how I really didn't want to be there.  My head was hurting, I had just come from another church service, and my back was hurting for a variety of reasons.  I confessed to myself and to God that I really only went because I felt like I had to, not at all because I wanted to.  Plainly, I just wasn't feeling it.  

Surprisingly, I was very comfortable with this confession.  During my time here in Mexico, I've come to the realization that there are some days you just won't want to do ministry.  Dan, a fellow intern, very often says, "I love my job.  I hate my job."  Or he just says one or the other depending on the situation.  We all agree that it is a very fair depiction of our feelings.  We won't love what we do at all times because God does not promise a constant party as you live out the call He has on your life.  On the flip side, it isn't all thorns either.  There are many many times that I am acutely aware of the blessing it is to work here in Ensenada with the people God has put around me.  

Having this understood, I know that I will not always want to go to church, and that it doesn't make me a terrible person.  However, last night, as I sat in the pew, thinking about how much I didn't want to be there, God taught me a lesson.  It was my turn to read the scripture lesson for the service, and I was allowed to choose it.  Before the service, I had chosen Isaiah 44:6-8 

"This is what the LORD says— 
       Israel's King and Redeemer, the LORD Almighty: 
       I am the first and I am the last; 
       apart from me there is no God.

 Who then is like me? Let him proclaim it. 
       Let him declare and lay out before me 
       what has happened since I established my ancient people, 
       and what is yet to come— 
       yes, let him foretell what will come.

 Do not tremble, do not be afraid. 
       Did I not proclaim this and foretell it long ago? 
       You are my witnesses. Is there any God besides me? 
       No, there is no other Rock; I know not one."

I read the scripture at the appropriate time, sat back down, and listened as Tomasa transitioned into a time of musical worship to be led by Abel.  As I listened to her, the depth of the words sunk into my heart and I heard a voice in my head say, "THIS is the God we serve.  THIS is the God you came to worship today.  How can you possibly want to do anything else?"  In that moment, things changed.  It wasn't so much that all of a sudden I wanted to be in church; my head still hurt, my back still hurt, and I had still just recently been to a 3 hour service--but rather, my understanding of why I should be there changed.  I understood that being in church at that moment had nothing to do with whether or not I was feeling it.  It had nothing to do with whether or not I liked or even knew the songs Abel was going to play.  It entirely had to do with the fact that I have so many things for which I can come to God's throne and thank and praise Him.  Our Sunday services are called Worship Services for a reason: they exist to create an environment and time for us to come collectively and worship God.  I've been learning more deeply lately that faith and following Jesus is an act of will and not something based on our feelings.  Very closely linked to this is our act of worship.  We make the decision to worship God because He deserves our worship, not because we feel something in our chest or like the beat of the music.  

So I made the decision to worship God on Sunday.  I made the decision to tell God how great He is and lift His name up even though it didn't give me warm fuzzies.  I don't share this to make myself sound like some deep christian who knows or loves Jesus more than you, but really to share the joy and the lesson God taught me this sunday.